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Inward Revolution

by Winston Smith

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1.
Burdened by thought, beliefs and words, it seems i think too much, while i feel too little. I know the right way for me, but it's kinda hard, 'cause truth's a pathless land. So sometimes I struggle, but that's already a step ahead towards my destination. I want to live free of fear, beyond the bond of time, I would have so many questions to you, sir, it's hard to comprehend this life and myself, but like you said, i have to be my own teacher. (I) keep asking myself these same questions, thought seems to be the root of all these problems. I know I'll find my own way, though it's kinda hard, 'cause truth's a pathless land. So sometimes I feel lost, which is already a step ahead towards my destination. I want to live free of fear, beyond the bond of time, I would have so many questions to you, sir, it's hard to comprehend this life and myself, but like you said, i have to be my own teacher. Never one to follow others, from each and every path I stray, never one to follow others, 'cause I know I can find my own way.
2.
I gotta find peace, enlightenment, truth, god, however you call it, to change this monster into something straight. Nowadays we all chant the wrong song, we think to be is worse than to become. Start to see what is and cast your ideals away. Can you expect someone to change if you can't? Can this world transform if you don't? For i am the world, you are the world, society is just a word. So let's do it. Everyone tries to change society following values or some kind of belief, but society is you and you are a part of it. So what you fight against is not apart from you, it's the chaos and storms inside your soul and particular beliefs are no more than conditioning. Can you expect someone to change if you can't? Can this world transform if you don't? For i am the world, you are the world, society is just a word. So let's do it.
3.
And when i first met you, i committed the worst sin of my life for not recognizing the beauty that you hide. A little boy, nowhere grown up, greets the rum and the girl both with a kiss, thinks that he found bliss, but once again he just kills time. Desperately seeking for something to fill that hole inside. And when i first met you, I committed the worst sin of my life for not recognizing the beauty that you hide. I cried on the telephone on that morning, I wanted time to rewind, because you my dear are my diamond to fill that hole inside. A little boy, nowhere grown up, drops a diamond and leaves it behind, still completely blind on both his eyes, just killing time. Desperately seeking for something to fill that hole inside. And when i first met you, I committed the worst sin of my life for not recognizing the beauty that you hide. I cried on the telephone, do you remember it? I wanted time to rewind, because you my dear are my diamond to fill that hole inside.
4.
This is the story of a little girl who found an enemy in herself, she wanted to become what media calls beautiful, but some forms of beauty don't support health. Trapped in a jumble of delusions, trapped by reality without any guard, trapped in a jumble of delusions, but let us go right back to the start. Everything began with self-observation at the age of thirteen. And thereupon followed addiction when she started to turn lean. I didn't notice anything at first, but then it got above obvious, i tried to talk to her but she refused to listen to me, I said: "Girl, you're about to destroy yourself as some forms of beauty don't support health." She turned away from me and cried she said she knew what was going on, i put my arms around her and whispered: "You will get through this, you‘re strong! I am here for you and i will stay here as your guard and i will always protect what's close to my heart. You‘re close to my heart." Everything began with self-observation at the age of thirteen. And thereupon followed addiction when she started to turn lean. The less she ate the more she formed hate towards her actual beauty. And eventually she cried decreasingly when she defeated her demons, the demons inside her, the demons haunting her, she defeated the demons, defeated them permanently.
5.
I remeber growing up, believing in what i was told, water is there to drink and nightly breezes burn cold. Conditioning reaches far, often beyond simple facts, it's ok to exploit for a reason, well, killing isn't that bad. I remember how they said, they could never live without meat, they know for themselves this is nonsense, they don't want to live without it. Well, it's ok, 'cause they can't be forced, everyone should decide on his own, but please take care of my choice of words, i said: Everyone should be free. I know some will laugh at me, some always don't feel it and hence, keep it coming, keep pointing at me, nothing but self defense. 40.000 children (are) starving today, because we withhold plant-based food from them, which is entirely used to produce your meat, please do not argue with creation. (Senore Matze Rossi:) Oh, I'm sick of all of this, I'm sick of all of this, I'm sick of ignorance, I'm sick of comfort, of excuses, sick of talking, of explaining, sick of begging, preaching, singing, shouting, yelling, screaming. I remember how you said, you could never live without meat, you know for yourself this is nonsense, you don't want to live without it. Well, it's ok, 'cause you can't be forced, everyone should decide on his own, but please take care of my choice of words, i said: Everyone.

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released June 30, 2014

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Winston Smith Würzburg, Germany

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